Waking up to unlimited abundance after a mild stroke would be the best description of my healing journey now. At first glance, experiencing a mild stroke on my birthday seemed to be the end of the road of living a life of abundance. My initial thoughts were of fear – tremendous fear and worry and anger and frustration. I knew the alphabet, my name, my birthday, but I could not complete a sentence and stuttered along the way with words that came out wrong. Why now? Why on my birthday? Why after I published my first book?
Questions snowballed into an avalanche of negativity. When I realized I could not properly utter words due to the mild stroke, negative thoughts rushed about. What will happen now with my projects? How will I direct? How can I go about my motivational talks and my workshops? How will I pay my bills if I can no longer work? How will I help my brother with dialysis?
It was fortunate that Michelle, co-author of this site and my co-trainer in various workshops, was present when I had the mild stroke. She was able to calm my spirit by giving me a healing session before we went to the hospital. Later, our Bio-Integrative doctor affirmed that Michelle’s energy healing prevented any other sort of paralysis in other parts of my body and that my speech would soon come back. With my knowledge in the power of energy and Neuroplasticity, I knew all with go back to normal in time. Thank you dear Michelle for being the angel of life as you coursed God’s love unto my spirit.
However, I still had to work on the area of understanding the cause of the mild stroke. What triggered it anyway? I seemed to have been doing the things that would help me have a healthy lifestyle. Why did the mild stroke occur anyway?
On the early days of my recuperation I focused on doing healing codes, listened to brainwave entrainment audio materials, conducted speech therapy daily, did yoga and meditation and shared my concerns with Michelle and Jess my brother, as best as I could with whatever words I could utter. Soon the trigger point of my mild stroke was revealed. Apparently, in my desire to finish my book and publish it on time to celebrate my 51st birthday, many stressors arouse. Allow me to present them here:
• The issues I tackled in my book, How I Turned a Punishing God into One Madly in Love with Me, brought into my consciousness all the hurt, pain, anguish, and anger I felt through my growing years. All the stored memories in my subconscious mind came up and my body automatically responded the way I did in the past. The cells in my body had to deal with all the negative energy that came with the memories.
• No wonder then, that I cried a lot in the course of writing the book. Two months of dealing with negative energies stored in the body was already taking a toll in my physical self.
• During the writing stage, I was also dealing with a sensitive case happening within the clan which put me in the middle of the situation. I believe I picked up whatever negativity was being thrown around with the condition.
• At the same time, I was working on a musical production which was set to go on tour two months after my birthday.
• I also learned that a few of our very close online friends abroad were facing health issues which worried me and Michelle and thus we began to schedule regular prayer times for our dear friends abroad.
• I was finally able to launch the Kindle Edition of my book a few days before my birthday. Just enough time to promote it and celebrate the launching of the book online with friends and family as a gratitude gift to God. Unfortunately, two incidents happened which caused me to feel the pain of rejection. It was the kind of rejection that I dealt in my book. It was the kind of rejection that made me feel like I was not good enough for God.
• The rejection came from the very people that I thought would understand my journey of shifting from believing of a Punishing God to that of a Loving God.
• One came from a priest who served as my counselor during a personal crisis several years past. He was excited to know that I was writing a book and urged me to tell him once the Kindle edition was available because he was a Kindle reader. Hence, when the time came, I confidently, posted on his Facebook wall a promotional video of my kindle launching. Since I never got any feedback on the day of the posting, I checked on the post on his wall if he commented on the link. Sad to say, he seemed to have removed the link and then a few hours later, I found out he closed his FB account. You see, as I tried to email him, Facebook announced that no account is associated with this name. Ouch! And yes, until this time of writing I have not yet received any message from him.
• The other was the fact that not one of my so called friends from the local Christian community I was associated with bothered to be joyful about the book. Although I had the suspicion they did not give any feedback because of the same reason my priest counselor have not communicated with me. I believe my strong message about the non-existence of a Punishing God was too radical to even comment about it and they too feared the implication of such a thought.
All the above stressors induced the increase of my sugar level causing my blood pressure to go on overdrive which resulted in the mild stroke. I never knew I had diabetes hence, with all the negative energy I was dealing with — my body called for attention.
Realizing how the negative energies stored in my cells affected how I responded to the present circumstance I was facing, I began to feed myself with the appropriate positive thoughts to re-train my automatic responses with new healthy loving abundance thoughts.
Soon, I was able to uncover the unlimited abundance hidden from my view because of the negative thoughts that prevailed during the launching of my book. The following are some of the “hidden” unlimited abundance uncovered after my mild stroke:
• Waking up to the Abundance of Courage. Deciding to publish a “controversial” book which tackled sensitive issues and having to deal with rejection increased my courage and added value to my decision to believe in a Loving God seeing it as the best choice I have made in my life to boost healing my inner child.
• Waking up to the Abundance of Determination. The choice to believe in a Loving God need not have approval from fellowmen who are not yet ready to accept a Loving God. However, it would serve as the inspiration to go on with my efforts to keep on campaigning for the existence of a Loving God.
• Waking up to the Abundance of Compassion. Understanding the predicament of those who are not ready to accept the existence of a Loving God is the best time for me to practice unconditional love—- loving without limits, loving without expectations, loving without pressure, loving without boundaries, loving without manipulation, loving without fear —- the very kind of love that God abundantly gives me and all of mankind.
• Waking up to the Abundance of Love. An overflowing show of love poured upon me after my mild stroke through email, Facebook comments, personal visits, and the like. All these love coming from family, relatives, close friends, schoolmates, batch mates, trainees, students, mentors, teachers, clients and online friends and acquaintances. God was sure I was able to see His love through all these beautiful beings.
• Waking up to the Abundance of Kindness. My mild stroke revealed how many people were actually concerned of my welfare and expressed their love through prayers, encouraging words, loving energies, emotional support and spiritual guidance. The video below is a one of the many expressions of kindness accorded me during my hour of need. Members of the musical I was directing came with a special song. I shed tears of joy and expressed myself verbally no matter how incoherent I may have been. I just wanted to say thank you. Thank you Jude for composing such an amazing song and thank you dear Siddhartha family for interpreting the song with much love and gratitude and all BLIA Officers and chapter adviser of the Fo Guang Shan Chu’ Un Temple who came to give me tremendous support. I am forever grateful.Cast and Crew of Siddhartha musical rendering a song composed by Jude Gitamondoc
during their visit to the hospital. Thanks Benjie for taking the video. An abundance of love and gratitude shared that day.
• Waking up to the Abundance of Generosity. I would not have been able to afford medical needs for my brother and myself and our monthly expenditures during my stage of recuperation were not for the amazing generosity displayed by family, relatives, friends abroad and online friends from foreign countries. They all pitched in to support me when I could not work and gave me financial assistance, medical supplies, food supply and so much more. Even until now Michelle and Beckie Sanchez, my childhood classmate and close friend and her anonymous “angels” send me love offerings. My heart overflows with gratitude and appreciation of such a display of God’s endless provision. Thank you family and friends for being God’s inspiration of abundant resources.
• Waking up to the Abundance of Non-Judgment. My mild stroke allowed me to see expressions of God’s love in all circumstances without judging it to be wrong or right but rather simply accepting things as they are and move on.
• Waking up to the Abundance of Manifesting Dreams. My mild stroke encouraged me to act on my dreams which I have longed delayed and now am now receiving the fruits of my action.
• Waking up to the Abundance of Endless Opportunities. My mild stroke has allowed me to open myself to more endless opportunities to appreciate life, enjoy life and heal as I do so.
This article can never contain enough of all the loving abundance uncovered after my mild stroke but it is my hope that my sharing will be able to help readers to discover more unlimited abundance hidden within their respective lives.
At this point I could confidently declare that waking up to unlimited abundance begins with one step –appreciating the presence of life in your soul breathing God’s love. Believe it, God’s loving unlimited abundance is always present and all we have to do is recognize them with an open mind and tender heart. No illness of any sort will prevent God’s love to prevail and heal those who seek His assistance.
Loving God wants us all to claim the hidden unlimited abundance He generously offers to all. Claim it now.
Love and Light